Moving in Together and How to Make it Work
What happens to Prince Charming and Cinderella AFTER they fall in love and get hitched? Fairytales don’t talk about that part because that’s when the hard work starts.
Every couple goes through the honeymoon period when they first move in together. This is the easy part. But it might also be the most important time to get things rolling in the right direction before the honeymoon wears off and everyday reality takes hold. With some simple goal-setting commitments and a little balance, you can keep keep the fun alive and make it work.
Here are some tips:
- Time. Spend time apart with your own group of friends at least a couple times a week, and, no matter how busy your schedules are, make the time to do something fun together at least as often. (Hint: the 8 hours when you’re sleeping doesn’t count as together time or time apart).
- Space. Everything you both have is now mixed together into some kind of potential decorating nightmare. Each of you should have your own space for your prized stuff that you refuse to throw out. It could be a room, or a wall, or a part of the main room that is yours and yours alone to set-up. “Her” living room and “his” rec-room usually works out well.
- Finances. To do separate or combined banking is something that every couple has to decide upon themselves, depending on their financial situation. The important thing is to sit down together and plan for certain things together or each of you could unknowingly spend above your combined means, thinking that you’ll be alright because of the other’s income. Plan together when you buy something big, take on a new monthly expense, and put savings away for the future. Keep track of what you’re both spending and saving every month.
- Change. Most women love change. Most men … not so much. Change happens. It will and it has to. Set goals that involve big changes, but move towards them step by step so that you both get there together, and both contribute something meaningful.
